Stay Close Through the Holidays

A connected couple is a happy couple but staying close takes some intentionality. At this busy time of year, it’s easy to get distracted by the joyous trappings of the season. Family gatherings, holiday parties, work events, shopping sprees and special family obligations making it hard to stay close to your spouse through the holidays.

If your marriage seems not-so-merry and more dim than bright through the holidays, you are not alone. Although a busy seasonal schedule can mess with the best of us, there’s good news. It won’t take a tropical vacation or an intense marriage retreat to let your spouse know that, despite the hustle and bustle of the season, they are still at the top of your wish list.


12 Days of Touch

Some of us are natural touchers, and some of us aren’t, but touching one another can make marriage partners feel more connected to one another. Set a goal to touch your spouse every day for 12 days in a row (or more) during the holiday season. You know what your spouse likes, so tailor it to their needs. Make it fun, make it flirty, or make it an extreme backrub — but shoot for 12 straight days of touch!


December Date Night

Take your spouse to a new spot for a date night. Since financial stress can wear us down this time of year, make it a no-cost or low-cost night out. Strolling through the local home improvement store can be surprisingly fun when you have no agenda or shopping list. Another low-cost idea is to drive through the Christmas lights at your local park or neighborhoods. Remember to hold hands. When you return to your own front door, don’t forget to kiss under the mistletoe — even if it’s imaginary.


First Memories

Don’t worry if you find yourselves detouring on a dozen different rabbit trails, because the goal of this activity is to have fun and learn something new about your spouse. Get to a quiet place where you can have a conversation all by yourselves, or include the whole family if you like. Take turns asking each other questions like:

  • Tell me about your first car.
  • What was your first job?
  • What do you remember about our first year of marriage?
  • What’s your first memory of school?
  • What the first Christmas that comes to your mind; what do you remember about it?


First memories can last ten minutes or two hours.  It’s fun to play this game when you are waiting for your food at a restaurant or heading to Grandma’s house.


Buy Flannel Sheets and…

Cover your bed with cozy flannel sheets and sleep naked with your spouse! Studies show that couples who sleep naked enjoy a variety of health benefits, including greater intimacy.


Affirmation Advent Calendar

Buy a simple advent calendar (chocolates optional) and each day you open a door, affirm your spouse with a genuine word of praise or gratefulness. Try writing down your encouraging words and affixing them to the calendar so the kind words can be cherished all year long or use a simple journal like the one available below.  Here are some of my favorite advent calendars.


Share a Chocolate







Spend some quality time together

Spend some quality time together.


Here is an Advent Affirmation Journal to write words of affirmation to your spouse. Advent Journal



More Ideas

Hopefully, you found something on the list that you can try to make great connections with your spouse during the holiday season! For more ideas on how to connect all year long,

get your copy of 10 Ways to Connect from HeartCall

10 Ways To connect with your spouse